Feeling numb and down?

in march my grandpa died. am nt very close to the people om my dad's side of my family but i loved my grandpa unconditionally. i felt terrible when he died because i promised him that i'll call him once a week when we found out he had cancer but i ddnt speak to him at all this year before he died. to make matters worse i dont ever think i told him that i loved him and i was not able to attend his funeral cos am in school in the UK and he is in Africa. i am barely over his death and then this morning i find out that one of my very dear friends died. i feel so numb i was practically shaking this morning and the only way i was able to go through today was cause i had an exam in the morning and i slept most of the day. i really need to talk to someone and i need advise on how to feel better am out of my guts here.